Two Guys, a Girl and a TV Set

Three college friends out in the world, filling the void with television…and loving it.

Hair today, Gone tomorrow: ANTM (S14: E7)

Posted by CJ Cregg on April 23, 2010

So, in the theme song for this season, Tyra plays with mirrors.  Because one Tyra isn’t enough.   Let’s use reflections to make 7 or 8 Tyras.  God help us all.

I can’t get over how ugly Angelea is.  She is not a pretty girl.

Case in point-ugly girl

Alasia is the youngest girl in the house.  Wow.  Neeeeeeeeever would have figured that out.

Whitney Port is taking the girls out and teaching them about personalities.  (Gurrrrrl, you’re fighting a losing battle.  Most of these girls don’t have personalities, and the ones that do suck.  Like suuuuuuuuck.)  They end up at a drag bar.  Angelea feels right at home.  Tyra Banks the drag queen is awesome.  (Also, he/she isn’t wearing a jumpsuit, which makes her way better than the real Tyra.)

Rhetoric question from the commercials: Who actually refers to their armpits as underarms?

The reason they’re at the drag bar is to do a “runway show with personality.”  The audience will vote on their favorite girl.  When the time to vote comes, Anslee gets not a single clap or hoot.  Turns out ice queen is not what people want to see.  The audience votes for Krista as the winner.  The show would have been funner to watch if the runway was stomped by drag queens.  Anslee says she stayed true to herself.  Which I agree with.  Stern, unpleasant, and boring is her personality.

As the girls get ready for the photo shoot, Alasia is late again.  And the models leave her.  She knocks on the door of the elevator to convince it to open for her.  Right.  Cuz elevators work like that. But  the top model limo didn’t leave without her.  Lame.   And lucky Alasia.

For their photo shoot, they’ll be wearing outfits made out of hair.  Gross.  They look like dogs.  Or carpets.  Krista was working it.  Alexandra and Alasia both floundered hardcore.  Like hairy fish out of water.

Tyra looks like a chocolate bar in that brown jumpsuit.  A ‘shepherd’ walks in with some sheep after the judges complain about being insomniacs.  Fuzzy clouds come down and the judges ‘catch Zs’ from them.  Obviously, they’re going to Zambia for their trip.  Or wait.  Zaire.  Definitely Zaire.  Er, Zimbabwe.  Has to be Zimbabwe.

Catching Zs

The girls found out that the final 6 girls are going to New Zealand.  Could that have been a crazier sequence?  Also, what?

But who gets to go to the NZ?  And who has to immediately return to their apartment, pack their bags, and go home?

The judges like Jessica’s picture.

Hairy Jessica

Tyra raves about how good Krista’s film is because she didn’t forget her face.

Hairy Krista works her angles

Anslee looked a bit stiff, and Tyra said she didn’t take enough risks.

Awkward, hairy, Anslee

The judges liked Alasia’s picture, but Tyra says she was stuck in her poses.

Hairy Alasia

Alexandra also looked awkward.  Like a ballet dancer in a hair tutu.

Hairy Ballerina

The judges liked Angelea’s picture, but I thought it was craaaaaaaaazy.  Talk about a hairy situation in a bad way.

Raina rocked it as per usual.

So who worked the hair?  Best picture of the week gets to fly first class on the 22 hour flight to New Zealand.  Krista wins.  Wrong call judges, Raina was better.  The bottom two are Alexandra and Anslee, which means annoying Alasia gets to go to New Zealand.  I’m just happy I don’t have to sit on a plane with her for 22 hours.

This week's real best picture

Alexandra gets another chance, meaning Anslee is going home!  YES!  We don’t have to listen to her talk about doing this for “her child” anymore.

Let’s see how many of the locals Tyra can offend in New Zealand.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: